Hello friends. I am going to blame everything amiss in my life on the fact that I am iron-deficient and anemic. When I looked up anemia in the dictionary yesterday, it reminded me that what this means is that I have a reduced amount of red blood cells. 
What this translates to is I basically feel retarded constantly. Ah yes, this explains everything. Because I am lacking iron and red blood cells need iron to carry oxygen, I am not getting enough oxygen to my brain. At least, this is how it feels. How I express it is by being really irritable and easily overwhelmed. And I cry at the least thing. And not only do I not feel like doing anything, I also can't do anything. The last time I felt this way, Ashley, Molly, Pretty and I were in Mexico over Spring Break, 2004. We lovingly called ourselves Team Baja on this crack whore of a trip. Most of the pictures taken of me on this trip I was sleeping because I was so damn exhausted all the time. It was after this trip that i dropped the Chinese Medicine program because I could not imagine going through 2 more years of school feeling this out of my mind.
Lately, I cannot get off the couch. And my brain isn't firing in a normal fashion. I can't complete a thought. I also cannot imagine getting all the details necessary together to start a goddamn practice. You mean I have to get a stapler and paper clips? A desk and chairs? And I have to write a bio about myself in my imaginary practice? Then I have to make a business card? Get a business account for money I haven't yet made to write checks from with money I don't yet have? It is starting to feel like a strange illusion. I almost cannot tell what is real and what is imaginary.
(So I live in a house. Is that true? I have a dog. This is true. Isn't it? I think I turned 34 last month. Right? If I remember correctly, I am Chinese and I dig girls. Do I work at the plasma center or is that just a bad dream? Am I really a doctor or do I just pretend to be one in a parallel universe? If I am not careful, the fabric of reality might unravel and I might float away and never come back. Wait a second, I have anemia, not amnesia. Right? Right? Hello?)
Phew, I'm back. I get confused easily with this lack of oxygen. The insidious thing about it is that I might just think that I've lost my mind a little bit and not remember that I am short on oxygen. Because I do feel just a little bit extra insane lately and it is hard to differentiate from my normal state. For example, I hate work and I want to move to Hawai'i. But that's normal. What is not normal is the intensity to which I feel these things which is A LOT. So I have to remember that I am not going crazy just that it feels like it.
To help my body get my iron on, I have read that the best source is organ meat. So I can supplement iron by eating liver. Oh. Hell. No. I will not eat liver. Sick. I am, however, willing to give up coffee (it hinders the absorption of iron) which is like giving up sex let me be honest. At least if I'm not having sex, then please let me have my coffee for the love of god so you know I must be feeling bad if I am willing to give up coffee right now. Yes, I feel that terrible. I will also eat a lot of medium rare homemade burgers. And consume what used to be called Liver Caps which are thankfully now called Energizing Iron supplements. All this put together, I should be back up in no time.
In the meantime, you can find me on the couch under a blanket trying to differentiate between reality and illusion. Or is it all illusion anyway? Or don't we create our realities? I can't remember anymore.
